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Written by Mohbaby…

     An hour before her number became unreachable, we spoke and she promised she would help Mide get some popcorn from Foodco restaurant which was close to our house. At that time, she said she was already in a vehicle and had left Abuja. I kissed her through the phone and told her not to branch anywhere but to come home straight after our Driver, Uncle Sheriff picked her up from the airport. The popcorn or whatever she wanted to get for the baby of the house could wait till the next day but as for me, I just told her I wanted to see her back home in few hours.

My phone buzzed on the edge of the bed it had slipped on, drifting me back from wherever my mind went to. I checked it with the hope of it being an alert from somewhere in the World but was disappointed when it was a message that came in from ‘UIL BETTER BY FAR LAW STUDENTS’.

    I hissed as I shut my eyes and I allowed fat tears roll down my cheeks. I brought my pillow closer to my face. I would definitely be going  home by weekend. Mide needed me and I was even running out of food stuffs. I already knew that woman wouldn’t give me foodstuffs so I would have them the usual way. There was nothing bad stealing from that igbo gold digger anyway. Was I even stealing? The foodstuffs were bought with my father’s money! I badly needed an alert to pop in. I was the only one she’d got afterall. I was very sure Adaora and Amanda would have showed her hell apart from the hell their mother would have showed Mide. Adaora was about the same age as Mide while Amanda was two years older than the two. Mrs Chinwere, (actually Chinyere) as I often call her(I can never in my life refer to that gold digger as Mrs Adesua. Never!) was a widow before she met my dad somewhere and somehow, got married to him. If my mom had known how heartless her so called husband was, she wouldn’t have lived all her life for him the way she did.

My mother practically worshipped and submitted herself to my dad. Even though she knew he wasn’t faithful, she still respected him. How do you explain the case of a man getting married to another woman just six months after his wife’s awful death. Was she expecting her death already?

‘ Men are so callous and wicked. F**K them!’ I breathed angrily. I already knew it would be difficult for a man to win my love or for me to get married. I already told my sister my intentions of never to get married. All I just wanted was to be called to bar, be rich, take care of my aunt( Sis Felicia) and of course my Sister, Ademide Adesua.

‘Yes! I wont ever forget to sue my dad and his so called wife when am finally big’ I smiled at that thought. I was definitely gonna rebel. They should expect that anyway.

I walked to the basin and splashed some water to my face. I ended up gasping for breath like a fish just out of water due to the effect of the water splash on my nose. I was an asthmatic patient.

‘I am not  going to brood anymore’ I said to myself as I wiped away imaginary tear drops.

   I managed to pick up a law textbook and tried reading but as fate would have it, None got into my head. I closed the book and starenmd at the ceiling again. This time, the fan was no more rotating as PHCN had done what they knew how to do best in challenge area of Ilorin where I stayed and schooled as a Student. I would have preferred staying in Tanke which was closer to the school but it had taken much pleas and begging from myself and my aunt, Sister Felicia to plead with dad to pay for my hostel. I had gotten a comfortable space in Tanke Bubu but I lost it cause of my inability to pay on time. Someone probably had the cash and quickly paid for it thereby making me lose the accommodation.

         I worked as a make-up artist for a modeling agency. I also worked as an usher for events in Ilorin and Malete which was also in Kwara whenever I got called on.
‘ If not for that witch that stopped my dad from sending me enough monthly allowances and…’

        “Moh! Stop brooding!” I mentally chastised myself and drifted my mind from that. I made a mental note to branch at sister Felicia’s house in Ibadan to see if she could raise me a bit financially before going to Lagos. It just dropped on my mind I had some outstanding faculty fees to pay and some borrowed money to refund.

“Ah! Nepa” I sighed and thanked God, oh sorry, my stars for making PHCN bring light just at the nick of time. I was already considering  ironing my dress for Mr. Onifade’s LAW501 early lecture tomorrow morning

   I was an atheist and had zero belief in God and his existence. I didn’t  believe any god existed! Not after all the crazy dramas happening to me and poor Mide. There possibly be any god up there looking at me suffering. I was an asthmatic  patient, I had lost my mom, I didn’t really have a place to call a home, I have no place in my Father’s heart, I wasn’t a beauty to behold. I could give enough reasons  there wasn’t any god anywhere. Besides, the Philosophy courses I offered in 100l and 400l was enough to buttress my points that there wasn’t any god anywhere.

I stood up and walked to my wardrobe. I rummaged through the small drawers for something to wear the next day(It wasnt like I had any option anyway, Law students were always in Black and white). I settled for a White chiffon top and a black straight skirt. I placed the shirt on my body and faced the mirror. It looked cool.

I made a mental note to go to Ilorin local market and buy some ‘bend down and select’ white  shirts at cheaper prices. I was running out of shirts already, and I really wasn’t called by the agencies I worked for to come render my services.

I made an eyeroll and stared at myself in the mirror as well as the soft shadow of mine that formed on the wall which I could see through the mirror. My facial expression seemed serene; I wasn’t smiling but I wasn’t sad. I knew I had to remain strong for my late mom and Ademide.

I lightly traced my cheekbones as I continued staring at my love shaped face in the mirror. My almond eyes with thick eye lashes and specks of light brown around my pupil was the only thing I liked about  myself. My nose was too short that I was often made jest of in classes. A coursemate once asked me how I managed breathing conveniently.

Coming down to my lips, I had full lips. When I say full, I mean full and not even full and pink but full and dark! If it had looked like Angelina Jolie, I would have had to believe there was a god that made me so beautiful.I couldn’t even attract the most ugly guy in the school. I wasn’t interested in dating any guy anyway. So I let that thought slip off my mind. But, even my looks and stature didn’t even encourage me to believe there was one god somewhere.

My ears were…. Gosh don’t let’s talk about it, that’s a story on its own. My lips fell open in disgust as I stared down at my shape. Girls can never get envious of my curves or anything about me. Except my eyes and face shape which was only fair.

I felt a slight pang inside my belly, no soothsayer needed to tell me I had to eat. I hadn’t even had lunch and it was 8:47pm. My stomach rumbled on as I glared at my window, the purple old curtains which hung on it dancing to and fro as breeze flew it to its own rhythm. It was about to rain. And in Challenge when that happened, it only spelt one thing.

‘Light out’…..I had barely finished saying when darkness enveloped me.

To Be Continued…

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