Must Read: The Church Accountant (Season 3) 18+… Part 13

A Story written by Oluwande Towoju (08160694908)… If you missed Part Twelve, read it HERE!!!

The following day in the office, I met with Mercy

Me: how was your night?

Mercy: (hisses) when he got home I observe that he was looking fidgety. I tried to probe further; I discover that he was hiding his phone from me. When I had the opportunity to check his phone, I discovered a number called him around 23 times. I quickly copied the number and called it when he went to watch Man U – Wolfsburg match. Do you believe that my so – called fiancé has a family in Badagry and I didn’t know. So when he came back we had a lot of argument and I refused him having S£x with me. He left in anger this morning.

Me: hmmm. This is serious. (Turning to her) what about me?

Mercy: you are not married I could understand. At least we’ve agreed to be friends without benefits.

Me: ok Mercy. Take heart…..

Mercy: why will I take heart (tears forming in her eyes) after wasting 8 years of investment on him and chasing potential suitors away from me.

I hugged and consoled her. I decided that she should stop talking so that she will not be crying. I told her to quickly do her work and go home that I will be coming to her place. Not long I settled down I received a call on my phone. It was Kafeeya

Kafeeya: naughty boy how are you?

Me: naughty girl I am fine. Ermmm I am sorry for what happened yesterday. i….

Kafeeya: (cuts in) no problem. Mrs Adedokun said a lot about you and how gentle you are in the house and so on. But…

Me: (cuts in) but what

Kafeeya: the way I always look at you in the church, I know you will be pretending

Me: I am too gentle to hurt a fly ma’am

Kafeeya: are you busy in the office?

Me: not really. But SP is in his office.

Kafeeya: eeyah. I’d wanted to send you the address of where you will locate me. 

Me: send it. Even if I won’t come now, I will definitely come later.

Kafeeya: It is important that I see you.

Me: ok….. let me see what I can do.

As soon as the call ends, I wanted to sneak out. But as I was about locking my door, the intercom buzzed

Me: hello

SP: Accountant, what are you doing presently?

Me: nothing sir.

SP: please come to the conference room immediately. 

Me: ok sir (call ends)

I went to meet the SP in the conference room. But when I got there, I saw the SP, the Church Board, Helen and other members of her team. I sat down at the vacant seat

SP: I called this meeting so as to inform and decide on the bank we will be using. I discovered overtime that the Bank is overcharging us on our income account and the recent payment we made for the purchase of the landed property the amount charged for COT is more. But I am surprised that the Accountant (turning to me) did not raise the objection to the effect. So I want to tell you bankers, you either reverse that COT, or we move our account from your bank.

CB Chairman: Accountant I am surprised that you could not see through the transaction. What happened?

Me: Sir, it is just now that I am hearing that the bank charged us COT on the transaction. I don’t receive alert except I log – on to the church mail to see the e – mail alert. And I observed that the password to the church e – mail address has been changed and the church secretary hasn’t notified me of the change of password.

CB Chairman: are you telling the truth

Me: sir, let me connect to the internet and check.

As I checked, they soon realized that I was unable to access the church mail. When SP saw it he calmed down

SP: but what about the internet banking platform?

Me: sir, you have requested for its deactivation since two months ago.

SP: hmmm. Ok but Accountant what is your say on this issue?

Me: (looking at Helen) sir, I would suggest you leave the accounts with them. Though I am not happy at the way they deducted that outrageous COT and even as a church we should have concession. And….

Helen Oga: Accountant, we cant do that sir. You know…

Me: (cuts in) I have a friend who also is a church accountant at Ologuneru. He operates a Zero COT on all his churches accounts


Me: sir, I don’t just want to be changing things here. Remember I am just four months old in this place and I don’t want to put this sister (pointing at Helen) to too much pressure from work.

SP: (facing the bankers) you have till Friday to reverse the transaction. If not, we will move our accounts.

Helen looked at me. When I saw her eyes, she was pleading “don’t take away your account from our bank” with her look. After the meeting I went straight to my office. The Team Lead that accompanied Helen to the meeting came to see me

Helen Oga: Accountant, why are you doing this to us? Do you want to red – flag our branch at the Head Office?

Me: I won’t talk much but whatever the SP says is final.

Helen: Accountant, I will come and see you later in the day.

Me: ok. (turned to my computer system) have a nice day sirs.

When they left, I got a whatsapp message from Helen 

Helen: Accountant Mike, please prevail on the SP to retain the church accounts with us.

Me: I will try my best but I am not promising you.

Helen: whatever you want I will give you

Me: what about your………

Helen: my pu33y

Me: I never mention anything o. but by the way, you are too raw

Helen: do you know that the 30 million Naira you transferred from your church account affected my rating in the office? Even in my office, every 
other Relationship Officers are doing all sort to ensure that I am being boxed out from the Bank.

Me: how? 

Helen: you know that you have a reserve account that is presently about 1.45 billion Naira and as I am, I am just an ND holder in the bank. So imagine, me sitting on top of such amount. i will do whatever it takes to keep your church account.

Me: hmmm…… this is serious.

Helen: so I am ready to do whatever you want me to do

I had decided to be on sabbatical for a month (i.e. not having S£x for a month)

Me: I am sorry no show for the next one month.

Helen: can we meet this evening?

Me: sure. 

Helen: I will send the address where we will meet.

Me: ok.

To Be Continued…

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Updated: Dec 9, 2016 — 3:38 pm

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Tosin SilverDam

Tosin Silver Dam, a mass communication graduate/BSc Holder, actor, ex publisher, publicist, writer and I rock things a lot #majah Email:, whatsapp: 08080664675, BBM: 5C350257

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