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Written by Therock5555…

“Dear Kidnappers,

It is with utmost pleasure that am replying this letter, I want to thank you people for kidnapping that devil’s incarnate. I have been thinking of ways to kill that boy before he kills me,  my neighbours and passers by. Samuel’s cloth are filled inside the two bags with you now, make sure you take care of him, and incase you get tired of him, just send him back inside this dustbin with twenty thousand naira because that would be his transport money to Kiri kiri where he belongs

Yours faithfully, Chief Thomas”

John laughed at the funny letter, then he opened the bag to confirm it, the bags were filled with Samuel’s Sweater, shirt, jeans, boxers, shorts and shoe with black and white shocks, his tootpaste and brush with cream were gratefully added.

John Fainted….

When he woke up two hours later, he grabbed the note and both bags with hot tears dripping down his face as he drove back to the isolated building, then he did not care if the cops were chasing after him anymore because there was nothing to lose.

When he got into the buidling he heared Samuel shouting for somebody to rise up, like he was conducting deliverance for a patient, he rushed in to see his friend Mark spwarled on the ground almost dead, his head had grown another horn like he was acting as a devil in human clothings, he was shirtless and fresh red marks lined his body as Samuel turned white garment priset was flogging him and casting on demons.

“Uncle we dey play mad man and prophet, na uncle Mark nai mad, me dey pray for am” Samuel said happily.

Like Mark was waiting for a helper, he slowly raised his head and stared at John, his face was like he got knocked down from keke napep, additional three teeth were missing. Samuel quickly ran outside.

“Oboy if we no go share the money 90-10 percent then I go do you everything wey this boy don me today” Mark starmered.

“Oboy Mark the person wey design your face go win award for best designer of the year in Nigeria o, see as you resemble person wey wan act horror film. Oboy clean your face joor, wahala dey o” John said seriously.

“You no see say na so the factory settings of my face be? Wetin, Him no pay complete money? Abeg we go manage am like that” Mark said as John passed the note to him.

In two minutes both of them sat on the floor like two widowers, seriously weeping out their eyes.

“Walahi if say I know I for continue my kpon kpon career, now see as I come wan die for nothing” Mark weeped.

“Oboy if na so Wizkid do, him for don give up him music carreer o” John add back up.

“Oboy how we go do now, make we use am do rituals abi?” John asked.

“Rituals? Walahi babalawo go reject that cursed boy, make we carry am go back to him father, I wan confess, I get 20k wey I dey save for the past three years now, abeg carry am inside that my boxer wey I no dey gree wash, make we bundle this guy back to him papa joor” Mark said as John went to confirm and true to his words, 20k laid in the boxer.

“Oya make we catch am joor, Samuel, come play” Mark screamed with the last ounce of energy in his frail battered body.

“Uncle John, abeg make we play together, Uncle Mark dey boring” Samuel said as he got in, Mark’s shirt was tied on his head like a militant.

“Ok, I gree but make you change your cloth first, your cloth dey booth” John said smiling.

“Aghh uncle thank you o, so you go even carry my cloth come, chai this is good” Samuel replied and ran out.

They quickly followed him, as he opened the booth and was about opening the bag to take his clothes out, Mark grabbed his hands while John grabbed his legs, they threw him into the bag and tied it with John’s belt.

“Uncle please, I no wan go house..” Samuel was screaming and begging.

“Your yansh, na till you kill person abi, useless pikin, maybe na for dustbin your papa pick you from sef” Mark replied smiling for the first time.

They put the 20k in an envelope and drove like mad to Chief Bola’s house, they stopped, picked the struggling bag and throwed him out together with the money. That was the last time the duo ever tried kidnapping business again.

Mark-Now a farmer and tailor

John-Now a houseboy and gate man.

Their music dream? Maybe till BankyW manage to hear them singing in their village choir.

Samuel-Now residing in Kirikiri VIP section prisons because no inmate could stay with him, his father is paying a weekly salary of 120,000 to the prison authorities for him to remain there.

THE END

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